We just put hard wood floors in the house. The wood in one of the rooms has too many grains in it and the room/floor look very busy. Friends have told me the installer should have dispersed the grainy planks through out the house instead of putting too many of them in one room. Is this correct. Could this have been avoided?

Flooring is sold by species and grade. If you specified certain grade you will have the boards from that grade whether plain sawn, quarter sawn or riff sawn which are mixed in.
If you wanted a specific cut of flooring which can be any of these you need to make that clear before the wood is brought to the job site, or the flooring is laid.
The floor layer does not choose what grain the floor will have.
Time will usually make the grain blend in better as the wood mellows from exposure to light.
You may have a floor that is plain sawn which is the normal cut if unspecified.
Plain sawn can have all the cuts mixed in. Sometimes the mill will grade out quarter sawn and riff sawn, which sell for more, so you can get lots of "grain".
It's a bit much to expect the floor layer to mix it all up as he is laying the floor.

As Pete has said it might be a lot to expect but it is doable as is making sure the joints and board lengths are staggered to give the floor a random look so there aren't any areas that draw your eye to it. Usually the installer will lay down several rows prior to fastening which is called racking....at this point the floor would be inspected for randomness....this will take more time than just grabbing boards and fastening them. Kind of depends on the installer. At this point you can either live with it or rip it up and start over.

Thank you Pete and Jimmiem.
I din't know about all the different grades and the plain swan etc. I wish the contractor had told about the options. I can't rip it up now, but as Jimmiem said I just have to live with it.

Usually when you're deciding what flooring you want you pick your species e.g red oak, white oak. maple, etc. and then you pick the grade based on the look you want. As Pete said, within a species what you pay depends on the grade. A little late now, but I'm surprised the contractor didn't show you samples or pictures of the different grades so there would be no surprises.....but even at that whatever you had could have been randomized. But, on the other hand if this is the worse problem you have then it ain't so bad compared to the problems of a lot of folks in the world.

I'd like to see some pictures. You should be aware this business is very segmented. Some guys don't have the proper training. Many think they can go on their own after a few months. Then they learn getting hit with complaints/repairs etc job after job. You didn't know, most never know.

I'm thankful I learned this business by working with about a dozen different installers over a two year period. Some are hacks while others care. It's just like any other profession.

A very noticeable situation that you seem to imply is rare, unless the guy had two grades to work with and didn't know any better. Is this prefinished or unfinished? It sounds like a sanded/unfinished in place floor by what I'm reading.

Could also be a fast tract home builder that only cares about how cheap the installer charges.

We used unfinished red oak. The contractor did not show me any samples and I am angry about that. Too many of the planks have those jagged lines that look like "waves" and I have very few planks that are solid. Which ones are plain sawn,
quarter sawn or ruff?

I am thinking of doing my bedrooms in the near future. Which grade should I order?
What should I specify? I don't mind paying extra to get a random look.
I definitely would ask for samples but would like to hear your inputs?

With respect to polyurethane, they used 3 coats of oil based satin finish, but I would have liked a little more sheen to it. I felt semi gloss might be too glossy. Could you use a mixture of semi and satin?

Before you do the bedrooms visit some local retail hardwood flooring stores and take a look at the samples that they have. This will give you a better idea of what's available and you can decide on the look (grade) that you like. There is also a lot of info on-line with pictures of the different grades. Concerning the sheen, semi gloss is probably the most common. You can see samples of the sheens in the retail showrooms too. You can also see sheen samples at Home Depot.
Also, next time you're getting job bids request to see some of the contractor's jobs where he used the same product that you are considering....that way you will know what to expect. And now, based on your experience, you will be able to discuss flooring, e.g. grades, randomness, sheen, etc.

Jagged lines/waves to me says rift/QS. Which is better than plain sawn. Got any pics?

I find that if the customer really doesn’t want too much wavy (open) grain, they don’t have many options if they stick with plainsawn. In T&G, select and better is the highest grade available, and with red oak especially, that has a lot of open grain. Rift is at least .50 cents more per square foot, but it’s the only way to go if they want consistent straight grain.

In our area, the existing floors are top-nailed strips that can be 80 to 100 years old. The plainsawn wood from that time had more straight grain, and the open grain is not as ‘in your face’ as the new flooring is. “Clear” grade is available in the square-edge flooring, but even clear has a lot of open grain.

The customer and I look at their old floor, and I ask them which boards appeal to them, and which don’t. If they don’t care for the open grain, then I suggest rift-only, or rift and quartersawn. If we’re doing repairs, then I over-buy enough wood so that I can use only the straight-grain plainsawn, because that will match the existing better.

My business partner used new red on a repair, and even though the flooring matched exactly in color, it didn’t match the grain—the patch had more wavy grain, and the customer complained about it.