Ok, you don't need to run the flooring at 90 degrees to the joists BECAUSE of the thickness of the plywood you have down. It's 1&1/4" total with the joists 16" oc, right? That's plenty stiff to carry the floor so you can run parallell to the joists. About that .33" too high at the wall, what I and most pros would do is take an edger sander with course sandpaper and sand it down. Your subfloor and underlayment are thick enough so just sand it down flat. 30 lb. felt isn't needed but also, it's NOT gonna seep through 3/4"'s of solid wood. I wouldn't take any advice from those "flooring people". Simply sand your plywood seams flat and sand down any high spots. If you have low spots, you can use the 30 lb. felt to shim those. Make sure that 3/4" ply over your subfloor is well attached.
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